from Aednan [XI]

Dápmotjávri. Aslat’s grave. Karesuando Cemetery.
Fall–Winter 1920
(Ber-Joná)

That fall
the Lapp Bailiff came

-

The ruling language
ran over us

Swedish words
impossible to pronounce

-

They pushed in
through our clothes
coated our skin

-

-

The needling gaze

a rain through
all that one loves

-

Dirty were we
living with dogs

half-nomads who
followed after livestock

-

Bread so tough it 
made your teeth fall out
baked by our women

-

In the midst of the breeding grounds
he appeared
with the darkening sky

To hold forth
among our
cows in heat

-

He had a message
from the three 
countries’ men

Swedes Norwegians
and Finns

-

Far away from 
the reindeer’s world several
families had been selected

We had to start forcing
our herds to graze on
strange lands

We were to be driven
from the forests mountains
and lakes

Migration paths and songs
had to be stifled
stricken from memory

-

The herd’s memory

the reindeer calves’ legs
that always
led us home

-

Now they would be born 
on other lands

Now each step
homeward in autumn
was a departure from
our lives

-

My brother and the others

said farewell to the trails
and hillsides

-

Never again would
we sit on the island’s slope
where the ocean smoothed
the stones

where Aslat once
had learned to walk

With this my stomach 
tied itself in dark knots

-

While winter 
as ever
whitened on

from all the colors
around us

-

And we tried
to scare off wolves
we traveled fast through
frozen forests

-

Then I was again
at home in the winterland

Watching twilight
dwindle gray between
gray farms

-

In the birch forest
across the ice
was a group of cots

With pillars of smoke
rising beyond 
the graveyard
where you were waiting
Ristin

-

Beyond
the graveyard walls

by Aslat’s grave

I took your hand

you had an
infected wound above
your eyebrow

-

Silent you placed 
the last stone
from the coast

on his grave

-

Nila’s fingers
had to be held
like jerking
reins

And the familiar
waves spoke 
to me 

of a freedom
in the sea

-

I said that I 
hated the reindeer

but needed them
too

-

We have to leave 
Aslan again

For the sake of work
and the herd

Here he would 
remain
alone

While we were being driven
from our homes

-

Then you said:

What kind of home is it
where no one dares say
our son’s name

-

Aslat is forgotten

Only his fate 
is remembered

But you promised me

that his head was resting
safely in his grave

-

The dead
were not allowed to be 
exhumed

-

And the bells
tolled beyond
the forest

-

We were called 
to a church weekend

One last time
we would
meet our own

-

Because now it was full

It was full of
people in the village

Originally published in the March 2019 issue of Words Without Borders. From Aednan © Linnea Axelsson. By arrangement with the author. Translation © 2019 by Saskia Vogel. All rights reserved.