Statement of Purpose

any way you slice it i was born for a good time

some of my primary interests include pomp
circumstance
occasion
and carousing

love a kickback and a kiki
very much love a tea

weddings
graduations
meg’s monday night birthday function i stayed at waaaay too late for a monday night

i’m mariah carey on qvc repeatedly describing herself
and everything she loves as “festive”

i’m andré leon talley specifying he wear a caftan
for his cremation

my dearest ellery said he can’t remember a boring day in his life
i’m free will agnostic
but with each conscious choice toward that ethos

the need for sleep
the need to labor
two little devils strapped to my back who synergize
to ruin quality time

just rude
needy
and greedy

depending on who you ask
i’m going to hell and all my girls are too
i’m afterlife agnostic but if some kind of something comes next
what else to call it besides the afters, the very last afters

and if my girls are there with me
i’m good

we’ll know who to haunt and do it well
dressed to the nines in maggot-drenched couture