Mae West: Advice

Ban tobacco: do bacon abed,

be delectable, collectable, a decent debacle.

Decollete’ don’t conceal; acne, do. Be bold

and be toned, an octane-blonde coed.

Be colonel not cadet, concede nada to doc;

date a cad and canoodle, be eclat on a cot.

Don’t lean on a deacon, be a dolt, a clone:

don’t bet on an Eden, don’t loot, don’t loan–

Be belle and ball too, a deb Coco-labeled;

be ocelot, be lancet, be candled and cabled.

Cancelled? Debated? Booed at to boot?

Elect to be tall. Don’t tan. Eat local.

Be oded, caboodled, be beacon and lect.

Don’t be a noodle: be cool and collect.