How Ella Knows
Copyright © 2018 Jeffrey Bean. Used with permission of the author. This poem originally appeared in The Southern Review, Summer 2018.
Copyright © 2018 Jeffrey Bean. Used with permission of the author. This poem originally appeared in The Southern Review, Summer 2018.
the train never comes.
You smell it anyway, its blue-coal
body. In August, the fringe sticky
with Queen Anne’s lace, you might
walk these tracks inside
gigantic noons. I walked them.
You might smash bottles,
of November. It strips off the rest
of the leaves, reminds trees
how to shiver. I think to Earth
it looks like the first first rain, the water
of the beginning, swirling down hot
into gassy soup. The bubbling stuff
that imagined trees to begin with, and also
mountains, kangaroos, dolphin cartilage,
stoplights. And you, tearing down
hills on Arnold street, a blur
of training wheels and streamers. And me
in the ’80s, crunching Life cereal on the couch
beside my night-owl mother, blue in the light
everything we are is here—
my dead grandmother as a girl
hunting fireflies in tiger lilies,
me throwing walnuts at gas cans
by the barn, stomping mud puddles,
my sticky hands lifting an apple
to my mouth. Here are dogwoods
and hills of corn that lead to more hills
of corn and more corn until the moon
comes up hot and my father
rattles the ice in his gin and tonic,
polishes his guitar. The horses