The Way Water Deceives Me

by Tamar Ashdot
I try to train my hair not to be oily
so I wait a few days between each cleanse
but some days, like today
I treat myself to a shampoo 
and I play a song that romanticizes domestic abuse 
I think about the way showers wash off blood 
and that the last time I heard this song 
my father slipped in the shower
and his skin opened into scarlet rivers
today the shower doesn't wash away any blood
because verbal abuse doesn't break skin
so when I see the droplets sitting on my shoulders 
I think about how showers are poetic
the way the water deceives me
convincing me that the trauma will go down the drain
with the clumps of my hair