Emotional Spaces

by Ruben Diaz

 

Driving on 19th
the cabin warmed by light
My wife and sons chat like
sweet sparrows in a nest.

The dark cavern in my chest returns,
Why now?
“I own a human story,
whose very telling
remarks loss.”
1

After school, I watch Popeye beat Bruno followed by Bugs Bunny
berating Elmer Fudd. TV emits light that warms me.

My Father, living with his other family, hears we live in the projects and
delivers a shoe box heavy
with cash to
lighten his shame.

The second time I see my dad, he says
“mijo como estas”. I smile and wonder who this man is,
regally holding court at the table.
Mom nervously preparing food and my sisters asking
if he’d like a Michelob.
His eyes do not find mine as I look for love.

No longer at the projects, now playing on the shiny wood floor of our new home.,
I line up a battle amongst the Kings and Queens of hearts and spades.
Rubber bands flying, defeating foes.
Sisters, will you play?

Emotions playing out while arriving at Unity on 19th and Ocean.
The boys go to children’s church.
At peace with God, I am
grateful to my dad for bringing me
to this world.
I am grateful to know that being present is love.

 


 

1The City in Which I Love You by Li-Young Li

 



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