Safe For Work
by Zach Peckham
we’re gurgling in our dreams
homesick priests of flora and fauna mid-dissolve
tautological nomenclatures of inescapable human misery
you’re waking up again
and the meme says you don’t hate Mondays
you hate capitalism
a Garfield joke echoes somewhere
kind of like when it was en vogue to use lasagna to describe oppression
but that’s not it
you’re varying
it is a wavered harrying distance to consider
the sort of space that hurts to talk across
churning inoperable chasm
modulating frequencies of overage-a-underage
challahlujah for this French toast buffet
a clumping network of tunnels running underneath the nausea museum
a new and original way of describing the complete inexorable condition
the absurdity of coke commercials that occur at a snowy north pole
uh oh
someone’s got a case of the Mondays
can’t tell if it’s the Sunday Scaries or the Black Friday Blues, you guys
can’t tell if it’s Happy Humpday or Thirsty Thursday, bro
can’t tell if it’s time to rise and grind or five o’clock somewhere, yo
this weather is intense
more like bong cyclone am I right
max out ‘til you pass out
hashtag poundsign
the residue always more incriminating
than the story that explains it
if you fall asleep it’s best that you do it at the wheel of a self-driving car
rather than in the shameful backward-facing babyseat of a thriving gig economy
you can delete your account if you want
but it might be better to just simply deactivate it
we would like to send you notifications
one way to know that your boss has been online shopping for dominatrix gear
is to have it pop up in your own ad suggestions
when you’re searching for whipped honey
that might be the closest thing to explaining it right
or it could just be the illusion of choice
the deliveries will only sometimes come to the right house but will always be on time
between universes one might spy a plane on which to have a lie down
then burning up on approach