Published on Academy of American Poets (


the atonality of folded underwear

the Tel Aviv of Chinese water torture

the martians of My Three Sons 

the parsimony of Tel Quel

the archivist of beatitudes

the Helsinki of Frankenstein

the Winchester Mystery House of devil-may-care

the worldwide franchise of Croatian mystery plays

the Bettie Page of situationism

the New Criticism of Ethel Waters

the marble pound cake of tauromachy

the Christopher Strong of Sesame Street 

the Michèle Morgan of abstinence

the 19 Berggasse of Calvin Klein

the stifling corridor of condom leakage

the Boris Karloff of Maiden Lane

the CalArts of maple syrup

the Lord's Prayer of Rumpelstilskin

the Gretchen's Spinning Song of fatuous praise

the Eli Wallach of pragmatism

the meal ticket of the Williamsburg Messiah

the Mrs. Robinson of Abstract Expressionism

the mead-soaked sheets of Melanctha

the Abbott and Costello of ostinato

the abracadabra of panty-hose

the Guys and Dolls of pineapple upside-down cake 

the Hungry I of Shangri-La

the Bog Man of Capitol Hill

the Beresford of bilge


Copyright © 2010 by Wayne Koestenbaum. Used by permission of the author.


Wayne Koestenbaum

Born in 1958, Wayne Koestenbaum is a poet, novelist, and cultural critic. Among his poetry collections is The Pink Trance Notebooks (Nightboat, 2015).

Date Published: 2010-01-01

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