On Working Remotely & No Longer Commuting with Chronic Pain
the train leaves the station without me / so does the bus / the sidewalks stay empty of my steps—the rushed ones, the ones pierced with pain, the its-too-late-at-night to still be walking ones / i keep my cash / it doesn’t load my metro card and then another card when the first one’s lost / i don’t panic in the car about leaving late—least not as much / when winter comes, i don’t sit on the cold, cold bench waiting and waiting, clutching a pair of my stockpiled hand warmers / i don’t bundle myself up in oppressive layers / or unravel in the late night, releasing the day’s pressure like a punctured balloon / instead i sit / and continue to sit / in this chair then that one / look out the window to escape the screen’s demands / wonder how i ever had fuel for those past travels / i rest / and i rise / and listen to the body that’s carried me here as it whispers the way forward
Copyright © 2021 by Camisha L. Jones. Originally published in Poem-a-Day on November 10, 2021, by the Academy of American Poets.
“While writing this poem, I was thinking about my pre-pandemic commute to work—three hours total, one and a half hours each way. I was astounded at all I pushed through for years. My time off was mostly spent recuperating from work. The pandemic immediately transitioned me and my colleagues to working remotely full-time. It opened conversations between us about disability justice and how to unravel unrealistic work expectations. We began dreaming of new ways forward. May we not return to ‘normal’ and its toxic expectations of productivity and hustle. May we all listen to the body for sustainable ways forward.”
—Camisha L. Jones