Pastoral
I watched my old life go by like television.
Slopes of grass whipping against bright blue skies,
Objects some called tools
And others, totems.
A woodpile, a sheepskin,
Garlic curing from the rafters;
A river’s loose slaps upon slabs of warm rock.
“Secret spot” read the caption disseminated
Online. Coy copy. Cool
Said the flatlanders
Whose ranks I’d effectively joined.
While those I left drifted closer to one another
Or God, to the sources
Of life itself: children and dirt. Unkept
By the present tense, I was distant
In my watching,
An existence I too tendered stagily
As free. Like television,
I was buying
Whatever was for sale
As the appraisers said You don’t seem like you’re from there.
But I simmered in the grid
Of there’s off-the-grid life: the flowing virtue
Of verdant surfaces,
The cemented-down conclusion
That meaning must be near.
The siren song soft focus of my own
Slushy memories reenacted
By someone else.
Good enough I brushed their expiration from my view.
I watched the endless plot
Of daily benedictions over the land.
The land—
O—
Any of you could feel
You were alive in its popular image.
Copyright © 2021 by Hanae Jonas. Originally published in Poem-a-Day on June 9, 2021, by the Academy of American Poets.
“I’ve tried for a long time to write about Vermont, where I grew up, but could never find the right way to coexist with the tradition or expectation of bucolic poetry. Simultaneously, I’ve been thinking about how the rural is represented by those inside and outside of it, who is accepted as being on the inside, and the relationship between online life and nostalgia. In this poem, I tried to address these ideas by leaning on, rather than avoiding, the pastoral mode.”
—Hanae Jonas