“Written in the aftermath of a vicious verbal assault, I spent many months with this poem attempting to make sense of what, if anything, I did wrong to prompt such callous abuse by someone who claimed to love me. Throughout my healing, I found myself soothed by the memory of opening the side medicine cabinet in the bathroom to create a tunnel of mirrors where I liked to watch the countless reflections of my childhood self. It was in this mirror-time that I was able to understand the various paths of abuse I’d unknowingly been groomed for throughout my youth. It was also through this mirror-time I was able to escape. The opening line of the poem is an homage to Federico García Lorca and his work, ‘The Ruby Disc’. Special thanks to Joselia Rebekah Hughes and Ryan Clarke for their friendship and gentle holding in the wake of my numerous unravelings while editing this work. Many thanks to Anaïs Duplan for selecting this poem.”
—Gabrielle Octavia Rucker